Attention HR: Finance People Deserve More Money
I’m at Harvard Business School all week attending a conference entitled Finance for Senior Executives. It should be entitled 18,592 Ways to Make Your Brain Hurt Really Bad.
The #1 lesson I’ve learned thus far is that Finance people have really hard jobs. My recommendation: if you are head of HR for your company, you should immediately give everyone in the entire Finance Department a substantial raise, calculated as follows:
(Current Salary + (EBITDA – 1 / .3891425672351497029834))
plus
(the time it takes a train leaving Boston at 6:30 a.m traveling north at 60 miles per hour to meet a train leaving New York at 8:00 a.m. traveling west at 70 miles per hour)
minus
the current amount HR is over budget for the year, discounted to the square root of the net present value of the amount your great-grandmother would have today if she had invested $1 in the stock market in 1907.














