Performance Evaluation Worst Practices
Here’s Post #6 live from the truly fabulous Advanced Human Resource Executive Program at the University of Michigan’s Ross School of Business.
Yesterday, we discussed performance evaluation best practices. Here are some worst practices – actual real-life performance review quotes used as evidence in employment litigation (courtesy of Professor Dick Beatty):
- “I would not allow this employee to breed.”
- “The gates are down, the lights are flashing but the train isn’t coming.”
- “He’s so dense, light bends around him.”
- “The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.”
- “He’s got the whole six-pack but lacks the plastic thingy holding it all together.”
- “Since my last report, the employee reached rock bottom and began to dig.”
- “He would argue with a signpost.”
- “If you stand close enough to him you can hear the ocean.”
- “Takes an hour and a half to watch 60 Minutes.”
- “If he were any more stupid he’d have to be watered twice a week.”
- “His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.”
Don’t let this happen to you. Please follow the suggestions we made here yesterday.
Got any performance evaluation nightmares you’d like to share? Leave a comment below or shoot me an e-mail at blawg@manpower.com.
July 24th, 2009 at 8:51 am
I once had a performance review with a company where my immediate manager stated she did not believe in giving “fives” (the highest possible rating in a given category.
She praised me for my product knowledge, and remarked that it was extremely important and comforting to her to know that, with my engineering background, all the sales people in our branch office, including herself, could come to me and be sure of getting technically correct information. When I asked her what numeric rating she was giving me, she replied “a three”, and explained that, inasmuch as she didn’t award “fives”, if she gave me a “four” I wouldn’t have any room for improvement!!!!!
July 28th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
I worked at a company where the prevailing mindset for some parts of the organization was just like Hal Peters describes; no one deserves the top number. Yet in other departments, the top rating was awarded for good attendance, it seemed. An exaggeration, but for a point.
HR and management need to monitor the performance appraisal process year-round, not just at the annual rating event.
I have worked with managers who will love Mark Toth’s list on this posting. They may see the list as a resource rather than a warning and unfortunately may include comments like these on their next appraisals–if they still use them. With fewer HR “partners” (because of downsizing of HR)who help both management and the employees ensure good practices in many companies, comments like these can creep into the system then turn up in employment litigation, as Mark mentions.